Wedding Planning So Far.

So since it's 2:30 in the morning and I have to wait until 3 to wash off my self-tan stuff I figured I'd write a blog on how the wedding planning is going. A LOT of people ask me how it's going and I never know how to happily say, "I'm spending so much money but I'm excited" correctly.

Seriously though, so much money.

Walker and I aren't into fancy, over the top events, no matter what they are. We like to be ourselves and feel relaxed, so obviously when I started thinking about the wedding I had to keep that in mind. Sadly, my inner girl kicked and all I could think is how badly I wanted nearly everyone we work with there and how perfect it's all going to go and OMG I'M SO EXCITED.

Let me tell you something, for me, it has worn off to an extent. This isn't a bad thing in my eyes. I put an extensive 200 people guest list together that included people I saw maybe a couple times a week and talked to as an acquaintance. I started looking at venues and realized why weddings are typically so expensive. I had to seriously think about who I wanted in my bridal party and why. The list of things you have to think about go on and on and on and on AND ON AND ON. 

One day it hit me and all I could think was, "This is one day for me and Walker and I'm making it about other people." 

We're both going to be 20 whenever the wedding day comes. We don't have a house, we aren't working the job that we'll be working 10 years from now, and our income isn't bad but it isn't banking either. We are at one of the hardest times in our lives and we decide to get married in it. When I say hardest, I really only mean that whenever that awful realization sets in of, oh my gosh I'm 20 and I'm not entirely sure of what I want from life or when I'll be able to get a house or when I'll feel like I have it all figured out. Now earlier I kind of made a joke saying that we decided to get married while things are so tough, don't take that the wrong way. I'm honestly so glad that we are. If there's so much chaos in life and the unknown, I'm grateful to say one of the biggest steps of life will be known while I'm 20. It's easy to forget how lucky you are to have found the one whenever life gets in the way. I really think the wedding is perfect timing for us.

Now, back to the actual wedding planning. I had to really ask myself what was important to me and Walker. What do we care about and what do we not? It might sound selfish, but taking the time to actually plan your wedding for you rather than the guests I think will make it much more memorable for everyone down the road. It makes your wedding unique, it makes it yours. 

I chose a venue that is absolutely awesome, it's in a nice area of town and takes care of nearly everything for me on the day, I just show up with flowers for the tables. I cut my wedding list down from 200 to 130. So far, these are the only two big decisions I've made that I think have grown me so far, let me explain why. 

I have enough to worry about on my wedding day, and having someone else take care of most of the rest is fantastic (that was an easy explanation, huh?) Now the guest list. I really started to question what mattered to me and Walker now, and what will matter 10 years from now. I had to go through and see who we actually spend time with outside of work/school/etc. and if that relationship was good enough to think of them there on our wedding day. It was a very hard decision, but in the end I'm glad I made it.

Planning this wedding (with the help of my awesome bridal party and Walker) has made me grow up a lot. I never in a million years thought something like this would do that. But I feel like I know what's important to us as a couple and individuals for now and the future. I've gained confidence in our relationship because of these decisions.

Oh, and only 110 days until the wedding! :)

New Apartment Post!

So if you read the title correctly..or follow me on facebook, instagram, twitter, etc., or maybe you remember from my last blog that we were moving into a new place May 3rd (kudos to you...and slightly creepy of you for remembering :p) WE GOT A NEW APARTMENT!

What a week it has been though! Wednesday I was feeling extremely sick, so much so that I went to the doctor, which I haven't done in a very long time. Turns out I had an upper respiratory infection or something like that, all I know is the doctor told me it could turn into strep and it was good I came in that day. Unfortunately that meant missing two days of work, and with higher rent now I can't really afford that, so I picked up a shift for the Sunday after we moved in. Monday I had a final in one class and then went to finish Lord of the Rings in the other. Yes, my World Lit class was spent studying LOTR and I'm very okay with that. Then today Walker and I went to the old apartment to clean it, and I ended up laying on the ground with my face in a pillow because I was (and still am) 100% over this moving process. I just want to sleep a full day and watch House, is that too much to ask?

But, let me go over the more awesome things that have happened while moving! We had a ton of friends and family come help move us in which we are both incredibly grateful for. We now have almost double the square footage we had in our old place so in general things just feel better if that makes sense. Our apartment also came with a washer and dryer...we did 3 loads in the first day, partially from excitement and also from not wanting to use the community ones any longer haha! Things in this apartment are nicer, and I think without the studio apartment we might not of appreciated how nice this place really is. I don't regret that apartment, but I don't recommend it either :p

Oh, and Rocky and Minnie absolutely love it. Minnie was very skeptical at first but loves having the doorstops to play with, and Rocky loves ignoring us at the bark park while he sniffs everything else. The clubhouse has a gym in it and Walker said he would go with me once or twice a week to it and I've already held him to his word and made him go once. We also got our first dining table today, $50 from Goodwill for a table that can be extended and it came with 4 chairs, we did pretty good huh?!

It's just nice to come home to something nice. It makes working 40 hours a week much more worth it. 

I feel like Walker and I are pretty much on the same page when it comes to goals, and we have a lot. Here's a peak into them:

• get stuff together for the wedding (flowers, cake, invitations, etc.)
• save money like nobody's business
• possibly get a couch, but that'll probably take a while
• keep this place clean (having to go back and clean the old one reeeally sucked because we didn't take good enough care of it)
• and most importantly, grow in our relationship with God both individually and as a couple

Okay,after typing them out it doesn't seem like a ton, but they're all pretty big commitments that we want to take. So say some prayers for us to follow through with these things, and let us know if you want to come over and see the place..maybe wait a while so we can build our energy back up though :p

Also, I need some recipes. I have a few good ones but I'm always down to try something new. We love pretty much anything, except I loathe seafood.

Thanks for reading :)

Being Engaged.

Hey everyone!

So pretty much I tried to type this in a condensed version on a Facebook status but couldn't bring myself to word it right without it feeling too long for just a status update. That's why I love this blog, I can type forever and still not feel annoying haha.

Today was really awesome, Walker and I took our engagement photos. It hit me this month that our wedding will be happening in about five months. FIVE MONTHS. Seriously, nearly seven months ago Walker came home and proposed to me?! It feels like forever ago and just yesterday at the same time.

Now, I don't want to say that being engaged lost it's spark or importance, but being nineteen and twenty years old, our lives seem to be forever changing and little daily happenings can sometimes override the fact of a wedding that is happening further down the road.

Am I saying this right? I guess what I'm trying to say is being engaged just became normal. Not in a bad way, but not in a good way either. It's a really cool time in a relationship where all the ideas and dreams for you life are okay to think and aren't too out there because I mean hey, they're just ideas for now. But things like the move, work, etc. can sometimes get in the way of our thinking and valuing the state that we're in in life. We're about to get married. Like, changing my last name, gonna have babies with this guy one day, married.

I think being engaged can change a lot of things. 

I keep typing this all out and the words just don't make sense. I'm a little annoyed by that.

Whenever we got engaged I looked at everything in a more serious light. At first I would be afraid when we would argue because oh my goodness what if it's like this forever?! But at the same time when things would be awesome it's I can't wait to have this forever! Forever. That's what changes it. The idea of marrying Walker and being with him forever was always a thought and hope, and when it became real I over analyzed every little thing because, that my friends is what I do best.

I think now I'm to this point in the engagement that my hope for us is huge. One perk is us being so young, but in general there is so much confidence in our future together. The bad things have time to change, and we no longer have to feel like we're changing them all by ourselves. The good things will be there forever, and we'll have even more as the years go by.

Y'all, I'm so excited to see what God does in our relationship. 

I feel that we fit together like a two person puzzle, we challenge each other and help the other pursue their dreams or simply keep their fire going while all else seems dim.

This session today was a good reminder of the man I have in front of me and how blessed I am to have him. I think having the engagement session so late in the engagement helped us in that little plateau we were experiencing.

I love him, and I love being with him.

*sappy, slightly confusing and not well planned out post over*

Yay for a sneak peek of the session!!

Real Change.

Hi everyone! I had some pretty big news happen yesterday: I finished asking the people I wanted to be in my bridal party!

The first is Mackenzie, she's my second bridesmaid. The second is Lauren (or Lawren as I call her) and she's my maid of honor. I've said so many kind words about them on facebook already, so to keep it short and sweet I'm just really really thankful for them to be in my life, and I really feel that they'll be by my side my whole life, so they deserve to be there along side me on my special day. Also, Jessica is one as well, I asked her probably about a month ago :)

Today is an eventful day off to say the least! I have pilates at 11, taking a check to my school for payment for classes, come home and do homework, spend time with Walker, then go to my FAVORITE FAVORITE FAVORITE band's show tonight. I really thought it wasn't gonna happen but one of my friends pulled through and said she would go with me. SO SO SO SO SO excited, they're the band that was the inspiration for my 3rd tattoo with the lyric "I want you to know the love that set me free, I don't worship a concept, I follow a King."

I'm just so excited :)

I'm also really excited to be seeing and feeling God work through mine and Walker's relationship. Both of us are trying much harder to be more tolerable and have less of a short temper. I have high hopes for us as we take things day by day :)

Mark 11

Jesus Comes to Jerusalem as King

It's really awesome to see the greeting Jesus gets in this. I feel it's exactly what he deserves for who He is, and these people don't even know that he's about to die for their sins.

If we saw Jesus today how would we greet him? I think I would just be in shock honestly, and fall to my knees in awe. I can't wait for that day, when my King appears in front of me.

Jesus Curses a Fig Tree and Clears the Temple Courts

"24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. 25 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” Mark 11:24-25.

So many people, myself included, pray for miraculous things all the time. The big realization to these people is that sometimes, God won't just fix it. He'll give you chances and chances and chances to fix it with Him in your heart, but sometimes it won't just be "fixed." If we didn't have to work for things to be better, to be fixed, ever in our lives, how would we really appreciate the change? Growth with God is a journey that affects your whole life and how you think. Do not get angry with God whenever things don't get better suddenly, chances are you've already had at least 3 times where you can work on it yourself and passed them up.

When you pray for something, keep it in your mind always, that way when the chance comes to fix it you haven't forgotten.

The Authority of Jesus Questioned

All I could think when I read the last verse was oh snap! I seriously feel like a child for saying that, but when these people came asking Jesus what authority he had to come through and remove the criminals from the path (they were selling robbed things), he asked, "'John's baptism-was it from heaven, or of human origin? Tell me!'" Mark 11:30. The ultimately reply saying they didn't know, and Jesus tells them they will not know what authority he has been given.