Division.

So far today has been nice. I opened at work (6 AM to 2:30 PM) then went and had lunch with a friend. Now I'm home, really fighting the urge to not work out. My eyes are so heavy right now, but I know come this time tomorrow I would appreciate a rest day much more than I would today. Oh! We turned the heater on in the apartment, yay lower electricity bill prices!! Also today, I found myself complaining about others to others, a bad habit I need to break quickly.

Mark 3:20-35

Jesus Accused by His Family and by Teachers of the Law

Right into it, verse 21, they are calling Jesus out of his mind. Being someone of the modern church cannot believe someone would say that about Him, but I guess in that very day and age where it was happening they sometimes could not believe His doings, but to call him out of his mind I think is a little baffling. But, that's just as we are in a day to day basis. We doubt Jesus and his abilities and we let the anxiety/anger/sadness take over while the whole time He is able to save us from it. Whatever the reasoning behind not letting it die to him is, part of it has to do with doubting He can help.

They even go so far as to say he is possessed by a demon, which is again, preposterous knowing all that we know now. But Jesus speaks so wonderfully in verse 25, "'If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.'" He then relates that to the accusation of him being possessed, saying that if he really was he wouldn't be able to drive out demons with a demon already in him. But still, that verse is so great.

I see it applied in almost every aspect of my life. At work, when there is tension amongst the managers, or even groups of the checkers against each other, it falls apart. Our scores drop, our morale drops, and in general we are not the happy place we are known to be. At home, whenever there is tension between Walker and I nothing gets done. We're angry with each other so no chores get done because why should we help out the other person? In my own mind, while I'm going through self-hate and think lowly of myself, my workouts aren't good, my eating isn't right. All because two things that are supposed to go together don't work. Those two things can make a whole item collapse.

Again, balance is so very important in life. Only one person can give it.

Stubborn Hearts.

Yesterday compared to Monday was a huge day in improvement. I worked (super early I might add, 5:45AM-2:15 PM), came home and made lunch/dinner, spent time with God, worked out harder than I had in a long time, and then I came home and passed out completely haha. I got a total of 11-12 hours of sleep last night, I think my mind needed it badly. Yesterday I realized in almost every aspect of my life I struggle with finding balance. In most of the things I do I either give/push/help too little or too much. What is the middle, and how do I stay there?

Mark 3:1-19

Jesus Heals on the Sabbath

Again, I don't practice the Sabbath. Like I said last time, all I really know if it is it's supposed to be a day of rest, and on this day and time Jesus had to choose whether to heal a man's shriveled hands or not. He asked around the room asking those who were in there what would be wrong and what would be right, to heal or to not heal on the Sabbath? "He looked around at them in anger and, deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts, said to the man, 'Stretch out your hand.' He stretched it out, and his hand was completely restored." Mark 3:5. Of course it is right to help others first, no matter what day it is, but we like rest. We like to be lazy, and so whenever someone asks for someone on "our" days it comes off as a bothersome. Jesus set the example to always help people, but this is where we also see that that Pharisees and Herodians plotted to kill him afterwards.

Crowds Follow Jesus

Jesus had demands and requests from all over asking for healing in many ways. His only request to them was to not tell what he had done. To me, I see that as a humbling thing, and also a true test to the people he cured as well. I imagine it would be so hard to be restored and then have to keep quiet about it, but at the same time, if it's the only request you have from your healer (especially if you owe him your life) you would have to realize how little of a job that is compared to what He did for you.

Jesus Appoints the Twelve

This is pretty cool to me to read. We get to read about Jesus handpicking his disciples, the people that would take on his job and then find people to take theirs after Jesus died. We also learn about Judas, the one who betrays him. That's all we really get, but to be told that before it even happens is almost a reality check to whoever is reading it.